


Cat Got Your Tongue?

by sxpphic



Category: Orange is the New Black, Wentworth (TV)
Genre: Honestly just read this i swear its not angsty, Shit Attempt At Humor, Sister AU
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-10-09
Updated: 2017-10-09
Packaged: 2019-01-15 13:27:59
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 647
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12321978
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/sxpphic/pseuds/sxpphic
Summary: Teenage Red & Joan AU where they're content. Please try and enjoy and don't murder me for it.





	Cat Got Your Tongue?

"Joan what's got you so bothered? You haven't been this antsy since your coming out dinner." The short red-head asked, tilting her head in curiosity.    
Joan didn't even look at her when she muttered "Nothing". That was weird.   
"By any chance have you seen Chester? That mangy furball is bound to impregnate one of the neighborhood cats." Galina asked, referring to the plump tabby tom they kept as a companion. Whenever he finished eating, his teeth were bared as if in a smile, just like the Cheshire cat, hence the original-unoriginal name.    
Joan straightened her back and looked towards the fridge, fidgeting with her hands. How could she break the news to her sister without angering her.   
"Joan? Is there something you're not telling me?" Galina asked accusingly, narrowing her blue eyes.   
"Uhm... I-uh -" The tall girl took off to the stairs, racing to her bedroom where she kept their furry companion. She was not going to lose him.   
"JOOOOAAAN!" The older girl yelled, her short legs working overtime to catch up. By the time she reached the bedroom door, it was too late. The door was locked. With a small smirk, she went into her parents bathroom, in search for a Bobby Pin. She shuffled through useless ponytail holders, half of which were already showing the rubber elastic, ugly little butterfly barrettes their mother made them wear as little girls, and oh god! Was that a used condom?! Galina dropped it as soon as she realized what it was and turned on the sink to wash her hands.   
"Fucking hell, and I thought  _ I _ had cleaning issues." She dried her hands and proceeded to go to Joan's door.   
Knocking on it gently, Galina slowly sat down against the door.   
"Joanie, are you gonna tell me what this is about or am I gonna have to threaten you with a used condom?" She growled, using her rough accent to try and intimidate her younger sister.   
"Jesus fuck, Red! Fine! J-just wait out there!"   
Red heard a various amount of locks clink against the door and wondered how many locks had her sister managed to put in order to keep her out. She stood up as the door opened and saw the plump tom under Joan's arm, while Joan was glaring at Red defensively.   
"Why have you suddenly become a coddler for Chester?" She asked, crossing into her room.   
"I'll have you know I've always coddled my little baby, even if it was away from prying eyes." Joan replied indignantly.   
Galina rolled her eyes and stood with her arms crossed and eyebrow cocked. Surely she didn't expect her to believe that. Joan broke eye contact with her sister and huffed, setting the fat cat down on the floor.   
"Fine!"   
Red shifted legs, nodding her head, waiting for an explanation.   
"It's just... I heard you tell Gloria when she came over...you were gonna eat that pussy tonight when everyone's asleep...I couldn't betray Chester like that!" Joan exclaimed, rushing through her sentence in sheer embarrassment. A light blush tinted her pale cheeks and her eyes were cast downward to the tom who was purring with his belly exposed as he lay outstretched.    
Red nearly choked, her eyes welling up with tears as she fought to contain a booming laugh. Oh jesus, her pure, innocent sister.   
"What's so funny?"    
Red coughed her way into composure, letting a few unabashed giggles out. "N-nothing...it's just Chester is very safe from me! I'm definitely not eating him, I swear."   
"Oh...then what did you mean b-"   
"YOU'RE TOO YOUNG LALALALA I CAN'T HEAR YOU!" Red stalled, covering her ears with the palm of her hands. She felt Joan push her out of her room and slam the door. Thank heavens she dodged that bullet. Now, to find out what her little sister was doing, snooping in on her conversation with Gloria.

**Author's Note:**

> This was inspired by RabeIsQueen on twitter & I've actually thought of originally making it a Red and Nicky Centric fic but I can't write really well and I've become rusty ++ I had writers block. I'm trying to lay off the angst since Halloween is just around the corner.


End file.
